All Things Anne

How Many People Does It Take To Light A Candle?

We have conclusive proof as to how many people it takes to light a candle: Three. One to hold the candle, one to hold the match, and one to hold the cell phone.

Wait…cell phone?

Last night we were sitting there, Mom and I at our computers and Dad and Eric downstairs making ammo (everyone else was in bed; it was like 10:30). Suddenly, and I mean without warning, everything totally shut down. Pitched blackness! Mom and I were like “uhhh…” I dug in my pocket for my phone and flipped it open. Light!

We looked around for Mom’s cell phone with the little light my phone provided, then we got the bright idea to call it. Like, no duh! So I called Mom’s phone so she had light. We don’t have flashlights (except for hunting); the batteries all ran down! So we went to light a candle. It was broken so I had had to cut the broken part off, and Eric was having trouble lighting the stump, so I held it tilted so while he was lighting it the match wouldn’t burn his fingers. Beth had come out of our room when the lights went out, and was holding my cell phone so we could see what we were doing.

Of course, since it was late-ish, once the candle was lit and the lamp was lit, everyone decided to go to bed so we blew them out anyways.

And there you have it.

I’ve Changed. Or, All The Blogs I’ve Thought But Haven’t Posted.

Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted bangs very much, and so when she was about seven or eight years old, she undertook it upon herself to cut bangs. Immediately upon doing so, she realized she would be found out if she was discovered, so she chopped those bangs off right next to her head. Which, of course, made it worse! And she was still found out anyway.
Lately, however, it was thought upon that side bangs might look good.

Before

After

To Make You Laugh

True Scotchman…
Whenever I’m asked “what’s for dinner?” I say “Food,” and they say “what kind?” and I say “Yummy kind.” Well, the other day the conversation went like this:
Jay: What’s for dinner?
Anne: Food.
Jay: What kind?
Anne: Yummy kind.
Jay (eyes big): Haggis??

On Independence Day
We went to a park to watch fireworks on the 4th. You know how fireworks leave smoke, well, it was kind of windy and the smoke was blowing, and each new burst illuminated it. “It’s lightning stains!” Jay said.

Grandkids…and at her age??
Abby and Beth were talking.
“I want a TV bug,” Abby said.
“You mean VW Bug?” Beth asked.
“Yeah, so I can take my grandkids around!” Abby replied.

How Country Kids Play Baseball

The other day, the boys demolished the railing on our deck.

The Pitcher (Ben…Eric’s on the left)

The Batter (Joe)

Smelly Story

One day, Kate was looking out the window and she saw a family of skunks on the other side of the gully! Pretty soon, a few more came strolling over…there was like eight or ten skunks in all! Ben and Eric got the shotgun and ran outside. The skunks went onto the neighbor’s property, so the boys came back in. Then a few of them came back on our property, so Ben and Eric went back out. Eric called me, or I called him, I don’t remember which, and I gave him a running commentary on what I could see, because they were above the skunks on the hill. Ben shot at them, and killed two (and he thinks he wounded another). Eric never got a shot, though, and the skunks never reappeared.
We were talking to another neighbor, and she said one year they had 17 skunks! They live-trapped ‘em and shot them. Man!

Livin’ High

Yesterday, the boys installed window air conditioners into the girls’ room, Beth’s and my room, and Mom’s and Dad’s. It’s kind of nice looking out your window and having a breeze…but the a/c makes it a lot nicer to sleep in! Well, last night, wouldn’t you know it…there was a storm. And I mean a storm! Torrential rains, all that stuff. It was leaking in my room! So I put a towel in there.
That wasn’t the least of the worries, though…Dad got quite a scare!
He was driving up a hill, in the pouring rain, and he couldn’t even see the car in front of him. He went to change gears, and couldn’t find the next gear. He looked at his speedometer…it said ZERO! He was rolling backwards down a hill in the torrential rain! Thankfully he got it in the right gear, though.

Aaaannnd…I was going to post some pictures of Elle Janie…but the person with the camera needs to unload them!! *hint hint* ;)

In The Dark of the Night

It was a dark, silent, hot (hot is a clue…hot means doors and windows are left open) night. Until about 3:15 am, that is, when there was this crash and a loud RAWWWWWWWEEEEEEERRRR that sounded like someone saying OWWWWWWW or a very hurt cat.
“Oh no,” I thought, awaking from a dead sleep. (Well, not so dead, because if I was dead I wouldn’t be able to wake up.) “Did someone step on Pi?” (Yes, Pi was my first thought. My second was…) “Last night when Joe and I were flipping the breakers, did we leave one off and Dad tripped over the fan in the dark?”
I jumped out of bed and gingerly made my way to the door (although what ginger has to do with it, I have no idea, I was just trying to avoid the stuff on the floor), but didn’t see Pi. I stood in the hall for a few minutes, listening intently, thinking “Well, if Dad tripped over the fan, maybe Mom would need help picking him up.” No sound from there though, so I tiptoed into the living room.

Nothing.

I went to the kitchen, and turned the light on. To the left of the island, under Ben’s barstool, I saw Pi. You know how cats are, when they are hurt, they act weird and try to get away from you? Well, I said “Pi, kitty kitty?” and she glanced at me, but was creeping towards the garbage can. Suddenly, she bolted towards it, and I looked around the right side of the island.

In the doorway, staring back at me, was Pi. Or so I thought. Her ears were back, her yellow eyes glowed, and her tail was all fluffed out.

It was the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen. I think I’ve read too many Alfred Hitchcocks and listened to too many weird, scary stories.

That cat wasn’t Pi.

It couldn’t have been, because Pi was going around the corner towards that cat! Two Pi’s?!?

I didn’t know what to think.

The thought of, “Is this Pi’s evil twin?!?” did cross my mind.

I was about to freak out, when suddenly Pi leapt at the other cat, and chased it off. Remember I said hot was a clue? Well, the door to the garage was open, and so was the big garage door. I went to the doorway and saw the other cat running off down the driveway. I was afraid Pi was chasing her, and would get lost, so in a quavery voice I said “Pilot? Kitty kitty?”

To my relief, Pi came out from under Dad’s car, looking very pleased with herself. I closed the garage door, and went back to bed. I had a hard time getting back to sleep, though!

Somebody has to watch the house while the dog’s sleeping. Might as well be the cat!